Movement Monday: Seeing With Gratitude

Gratitude

I think it is fair to say that many of us may have had moments, or extended moments, of seeing with gratitude this year despite, or because of, the crises. What crises? Take your pick: the pandemic with the related economic and social implications, social unrest/black lives matter, the U.S. elections or climate change. Consequently many of us have experienced a vulnerability previously not known.

Vulnerability

This vulnerability can surface a lot of negative emotions: fear, anger, grief, sadness, outrage. It can be hard to have a positive mind and be grateful when in these emotional states.

Empowering Questions

Given these states, amidst all of the swirl this year, here are questions I've heard numerous times from clients: "Why is this happening? "Why is this happening to me?" "What are they doing to me?" "How could they let me go - I'm a star performer?!" "How can I possibly know I am making the right decisions for my business and my people in this environment?" "When will 'they' allow us to go back to... (fill in the blank)?" These kind of questions are not helpful as they tend to disempower people, keeping them in a victim mindset. It's okay to vent frustration, fear or perhaps anger. Then, the productive thing to do is to look at what you can control and focus your attention and actions there. This is not a new concept. The challenge is in practicing it, particularly when you are in the midst of navigating multiple, concurrent challenges.

Here are ways to reframe the above questions: Why is his happening FOR me? How is this experience changing me? How do I need to change in relationship to this experience? What is this experience trying to tell me that I am not getting right now? What can I learn from this? What can I do differently to get the results that matter most to me and those I care about or to whom am accountable? What can I do about this? How can I move myself to a different place? What can I do to put myself in the most proactive, empowered place in this situation, even though (fill in the blank) is happening? How can I make the best decision today, given what I currently know; knowing things could change later - today, tomorrow or next week?

Identify one question above that you could incorporate into your current repertoire of work/life navigation tools.

A Reorienting Practice

If you are not used to asking yourself these kinds of questions, particularly when you are stressed, then this may require a little more work at rewiring your brain to accept what is happening and work with it, versus not accepting or railing against it. How can you reorient yourself to this way of thinking - habitually? What is the benefit? Neuroscience has taught us that optimal productivity and wellbeing are inextricably linked. A key place to continually put yourself in, to cultivate both, is a state of being slightly happy.

You may ask, how can I possibly be happy, given the state of the world today with so much uncertainty and dramatic change? The science of happiness states that is a choice. Even if it's a choice you need to make dozens of times a day. To effect this, it helps to think about your relationship to the events going on around you. How do you choose to relate to what is happening?

Synchrony & Attention

Here's what just happened... As I wrote the last sentence I was overcome with a cacaphony of a huge gaggle of geese flying by. How synchronous. I paused to see if I could spot them through the trees. Geese inherently know how to stay aligned, and in communication, while in motion. They also have each other's backs, or wings so-to-speak. The lead bird can change positions, the rear bird can come up from behind, and the entire flock can reconfigure - all while in motion.

How geese move in formation is an analogy often used in team building development. You can consider this for your team, if you lead one. You can also consider this for yourself - how do you keep yourself aligned on the right things, at the right time, with all the moving parts you orchestrate on a daily basis? What grabs your attention and how do you know what to shift to in a given moment? And how do you do all this through the lens of being grateful for whatever comes your way versus being IN the way?

A Way of Seeing: The Lens of Gratitude

Marcel Proust said, “My destination is no longer a place, rather a new way of seeing." When we change our perception, our whole world changes. I adopted a gratitude practice over a decade ago. I call it a practice because I need to keep these muscles well-honed, particularly when I am stretched or stressed.

Gratitude Practice

My gratitude practice is a form of meditation. My mind wanders. I get pissed off. I don't like something. I won't appreciate it. It is precisely at these times that I need to double-down on being grateful. It is a willingness - not in a by-pass kind of way, but in a way that has me asking myself, "Even though...I can still be grateful for..." It doesn't exclude all the other noise, but it can override it. It's a way to force myself to stay consciously at a higher mental altitude when the weight of issues can bring me down.

Giving Thanks - An American Tradition

This week in the U.S. we celebrate Thanksgiving - a holiday that our ancestors declared - to be grateful for this new country and way of living. Now, more than ever, as the country I love is divided, we need to see with fresh eyes. Even though... what is good in your world? What is great about this country? What would you appreciate more if you didn't have it? Maybe start there - gratitude while you still have the thing or person you are grateful for...

Many of us will have different Thanksgivings due to social distancing. In my case, my partner and I will cook a nice meal at home and zoom with our adult children and extended family. This may not be what we ideally want, but we can still have connection and exchange. How grateful we are for the technology that exists today!

This is what I love about Thanksgiving, my favorite holiday. It is not about presents but being present with, and to, those I love - while eating great food.

Hearts Turned Around

The photo above is a yogi in prayer pose in front of the back door of the heart. Prayer pose is a yogic (non-religious) posture. From a science perspective, it is bringing the ends of your energy meridians (via the tips of your fingers) together. It is a centering pose - literally consolidating your energy.

I am using this as a metaphor. Things maybe flipped around, upside down, or just different this year. The invitation is to see what is wonderful never-the-less, and give thanks. My thanks is for health - for myself and my family. My maternal grandmother always said, "If you have your health, you have everything." I have had occasion many times in my life to be reminded of this. It's usually when something happens to my health that I most appreciate it. Born in 1899, Grandma brought a timeless wisdom into my life. I think I am in good company with this particular appreciation in this year of COVID.

Action

What is one thing you are grateful for? How will you honor it?