Working with Shock & Grief

Last Monday, I said I would post an entry every week on Magic Mondays, with a Follow-up Friday.

Sometimes we can have the best laid plans…And then life hits us in the face.

I was getting ready to post a completely different blog entry today when I got an email from a fellow yoga instructor, that stopped me in my tracks. A friend of mine, who had gone through yoga teacher training with us, was murdered by her husband last night during the lunar eclipse.

I have been in shock and grieving ever since.

My original entry is not important now.

I last saw this friend, Lisa, on August 2nd, at a party when she told me she was going to file for divorce. I suggested she think carefully about how, where, when she would tell her husband as she had some concerns about his reaction.

I texted her 12 days ago to check-in and see how she was doing. I did not hear back so called and left a voicemail message last week. People get busy and you eventually catch up with each other… or so you hope. My heart goes out to Lisa and her family, particularly her four children – who now have no parents.

It’s ironic that last week I was talking about guns, violence and mental illness.  Needless to say, I wasn’t productive after this news today. Our yoga community supported each other via calls and emails. One of our mutual friends and fellow instructor, came over and we hugged, talked, did some healing meditations and said prayers for Lisa and her family.Being connected with family and friends helps with shock and grief – so does talking, expressing, and trying to make sense of senseless acts. I noticed I was judging myself because I broke down and cried. Why wouldn’t I? It’s horrific news. Why was I judging myself at this time?

My reflection question for myself and others going through something similar:

What helps with exercising self-care in processing the loss and senseless act of violence and looking for ways to help those effected?\